Autistic Spectrum Disorder

Hi! I have a son who is 4 and we have been told recently that he shows signs of having ASD and ADHD although not completely confirmed/diagnosed as yet.
His behaviour at present is getting worse by the day and although i discipline him i have no idea how far to discipline him when he has been naughty - does he understand??
I brought him and his sister a goldfish each yesterday - today he killed 1 because he only wanted 1 goldfish!! He seemed to have no idea of the consequences or understand that what he had done was very wrong.
Just wondering if there is anyone that can help/advise me on these matters? Is this normal for a child with ASD / ADHD to do???

Hi there.

I don't know about ADHD but our 2 boys are 7 and 5 and both have ASD and do have some behavioural problems. They certainly don't understand when they have done wrong and they lack the communication skills for us to explain things to them. For disciplining we just try to be firm and say no when they do wrong but a lot of their behavioural problems aren't because they're misbehaving but are down to their autism and lack of communication which can cause a lot of frustration. Have you any luck with getting a diagnosis for your son yet?

Hello and welcome steph313



I notice you have not got a diagnosis (dx) yet, if you speak with the people in your area who are carrying out your dx I am sure they will be able to put yuo in contact with someone who is running courses for parents of children with ASD, like you say its very difficult knowing how to tell a child on the spectrum off, these courses I found were really helpfull as they give you ideas on how to deal with differnt situations, plus you get to meet other parents who may also be able to give you some idea of what works for them etc and then you can adjust it to suit your situation,

Don't forget you can always post here and I am sure you will get some answers

Regarding the goldfish I am not sure about the killing part being normal, but I can understand that he only wanted 1, out of interest what have you done with the other 1? Did you buy two bowls etc?

A social story would be good for this, although these are not my strong points I have to say, maybe you could draw two fish bowls with one fish in each and draw your children with them, then in the next picture draw your daughter happy with her fish in her bowl and your son with an empty bowl I am hope that someone will come along and add to this, sorry it's not very good but I hope you can understand where I am comming from.

What I am trying to say is that ASD children work very well with visual things, so if you are able to show what you have said above in a picture story (social story) you may find he is able to understand what he has done


Good luck